My husband and I got married more than 10 years ago. We are both from the countryside, so we did not have a house in Hanoi and had to rent a house for a year after getting married. Neither of our families had much money, so we decided that we would have to take care of ourselves.
In 2015, after finding out I was pregnant, I felt the need for housing became more urgent than ever. Because we wanted to ask my grandmother to come and help look after the baby, we needed a house to live in.
My husband and I only had over 200 million VND so we had to borrow from the bank. We were able to buy a two-bedroom apartment for over 1 billion VND.
My husband and I have a combined income of nearly 30 million VND/month. For many years, we have spent about 7-8 million VND each month to pay the bank.
The rest we spend on family and save. Because of the preferential loan package, the fixed interest rate is only 5% for 15 years. Thanks to that, when we have extra money, we do not pay it all off right away but want to save it for other purposes.
Up to now, although we are still in debt, we have saved a small amount of money. The life of a family of four, including husband, wife and two children, is quite good. Occasionally, we even travel together.
In the near future, I plan to use the money I have saved with my brother to buy a piece of land in the countryside. Land is still profitable in the long run. However, my husband gave me a very surprising idea.
My husband and I don't see eye to eye when it comes to buying a car (Illustration: ShutterStock).
He said he would use that money to buy a car, of course my wife and I would still have to borrow a little more. The procedure is now simple because we can use the car as collateral. With our current income, we are completely capable of paying off the house loan, paying off the car loan and ensuring our lives.
According to him, my wife and I live far from the city center, if we have a car to go to work, it will be convenient, without the trouble of rain and sun. Moreover, taking the children to school will also be more convenient.
Having a car also helps my husband and I to have less trouble every time we go back to our hometown, and travel safely and conveniently. With our own vehicle, we can move proactively, no longer having to go back to our hometown one day and then rush back to Hanoi the next day to catch the bus.
My husband also said that we were almost 40 years old anyway, so we should think about a life with more conveniences. Having a car would also give him more motivation and goals to strive for.
When convincing me, my husband also cited stories from his friends that everyone said "having a car is great", "if we knew driving on four wheels was this great, we would try to buy a car sooner"... Many of his friends still owe money on their house but still bought cars a few years ago.
Of course, everyone would wish for a convenient life, where the rain never touches their face or the sun never touches their head. But I think that is when there is no more debt, and there is a stable savings or investment. However, my wife and I still owe more than 300 million VND - not a small amount of money.
Not only that, I think cars are "consumables", buying them for use will only cause them to lose value. Meanwhile, the most important thing for my family is to save, invest, prepare and take care of the future of my children. I am not stupid enough to "put" another debt around my neck.
I immediately objected to my husband's proposal. My husband was very unhappy and thought that I was an old-fashioned person. My husband and I gave birth to children, we loved them, and we had the responsibility to take care of them, feed them, and educate them until they were adults. Later, if we had any surplus, we would give them some wealth. I should not force myself to live a miserable life just to save money for my children.
He wants his children to be independent and take care of themselves in the future, just like the way we have lived and made a living in a faraway land.
My husband and I are still at odds with each other. The atmosphere in our family has been increasingly tense over the past few weeks.
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