I never gave my wife flowers on March 8th.

Ở trong nhà tôi, hình như không có chuyện gì không qua tay vợ mà xong! - Ảnh: P.X.V. — In my house, it seems like there's nothing that can't be done without going through my wife's hands! - Photo: PXV

To be honest, I have never bought my wife a gift before, not even flowers. Decades ago, when we were in love, "You are poor, I am not rich either".

I am the eldest daughter in the family, had to drop out of school early to help my parents with business to raise my younger siblings. I am a student of education, hungry all year round, rarely have money in my pocket.

There were times when I ran to her shop at noon, knowing I was hungry, she took me to a cheap restaurant, ordered a plate of rice for me to eat, and she said she had just eaten and was still full. We had been married for decades before she told the truth, at that time she only had enough money to feed me so she said that.

When they got married, both husband and wife were penniless and had difficult economic conditions. When his wife had just given birth to a daughter a month earlier, the couple borrowed a few taels of gold to build a temporary thatched house on the rice field.

Artists often poeticize everything, saying it's "a thatched roof, two golden hearts" or "an ideal hut". Life is not like a dream, so reality is not as romantic as literature.

On rainy days, water leaks from the roof and flows right onto the mosquito net. We have to cover it with a raincoat, and when it is full, we push it down. The couple doesn’t sleep all night, sitting with their knees drawn up in the mosquito net, and whenever a spot gets wet, we move the baby to a dry spot.

Now that the children are grown up and are grandparents, and the family's finances are stable, my wife never worries or calculates about spending money on her husband and children, but when it comes to shopping for herself, she is always very frugal and thrifty.

At the end of the year, my wife and I went shopping at the supermarket. When it was time to pay, I saw that my wife had bought all the things for me and my children, and none of her own. I asked her why she didn't buy some new clothes for herself. My wife said she had a few new clothes, but she rarely went out, so why waste them by buying more?

When we were in love, no one knew what March 8th or Women's Day was. Even if they did, life was so difficult back then that no one thought of giving cards, flowers, or gifts.

And now, every time there is a women's holiday like International Women's Day, Vietnamese Women's Day, my wife's birthday... my daughter always suggests: "Dad, buy something for Mom!". When I mention this to my wife, she always brushes it off: "Don't make a fuss, why buy it, just leave the money to me!".

That's it.

When I was a civil servant, every year the company organized a vacation for the staff. Every year I invited my wife to go with me, but she rarely went with me because the company only paid for one trip, the person who came had to pay. My wife was stingy with the money, so almost every year it was just the two of us going together.

During the tour , near the return date, the group had a free day to go shopping. Almost everyone bought gifts for relatives.

I called my wife and asked (I had to ask for her opinion on everything, just to be sure, otherwise things would get messy): Can you buy this or that for me? My wife waved me off: "Don't buy anything, there are plenty of supermarkets in Saigon, they sell everything from every country, and they're even cheaper. Just go out and have fun, just remember to keep the baby safe for me!"

That's it!

My family sometimes has problems, sometimes I get annoyed, I also grumble, get a little grumpy (but only mumble). Immediately my daughter speaks up: "Dad, don't argue with Mom! The house must have a roof!". You and me, eat and shit talk!

But thinking back, she was right! In the house, big or small, there was nothing that didn't fall to her mother.

My wife, when happy, would say: "You two are really good, you're all highly educated, and I'm only in 6th or 7th grade, but every time it comes to money, you ask me why, am I an ATM, a bank? And it's not just about money, I'm a restaurant chef, a doctor, a nurse, and...!".

So a whole bunch of "just right" things were listed. Indeed, in this house, it seems like there's nothing that can't be done without going through the wife's hands!

My wife refuses to give me flowers or gifts, so this year I suggest that the whole family go out and find a place to celebrate March 8th. I wonder if my wife will approve, or will she just "leave the money to me"?

We invite readers to discuss and share on the topic: " Do women need to receive gifts and have gifts to be happy? " send to email bichdau@tuoitre.com.vn or comment below the article. Thank you for reading.

Ngày 8-3: Sợ những bữa liên hoan cho đẹp mặt!

March 8: Fear of parties to look good!

Every time there are holidays for women, such as March 8 or October 20, many women are afraid of the parties organized by their male colleagues out of obligation or to look good in front of other departments.

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