You are the valedictorian, your parents refuse to… praise you.

(Dan Tri) - When contacted by the school or reporters, L.'s parents made a request: "Please allow my child to keep his academic results a secret." They also hope the school will not reward L.

Exam season with a series of exams such as entrance exams to specialized schools, 6th grade entrance exams, 10th grade entrance exams, high school graduation exams is also the season for valedictorians to share their achievements and study secrets.

Portraits of valedictorians at exams often bring inspiration, motivation and learning methods to many people.

Students in the competitive exam to enter grade 6 in Ho Chi Minh City (Photo: Hoai Nam).

In the entrance exam to grade 6 at one of the most difficult schools in Ho Chi Minh City this year, Mr. H. and Ms. N.'s child was the valedictorian with a very high score.

Along with that, there will often be awards, congratulations, sharing about the "valedictorian portrait" from the old elementary school you just graduated from to the new school you just passed the entrance exam to, to the media...

But no, except for the Principal and the exam scoring department at the 6th grade entrance exam at the new school the student just attended, almost no one knew that L. was the valedictorian.

When contacted by the school or reporters, L.'s parents made a request: "Please allow my child to keep his academic results a secret." They also hope the school will not reward him individually, and if so, reward him together with other students.

Mr. H. and Ms. N. said that even relatives, neighbors, teachers from the old school or friends on Facebook did not know that their child was the valedictorian of this exam. They did not see the need to share private information about the child's studies.

To them, it's simply that you just passed the entrance exam to the school you wanted and you were luckier than those who didn't get in. Your high score shows that you are confident and did well on that test within the exam framework, but that doesn't mean you are good or excellent.

This does not mean that they are not happy with the results their children have achieved. But they choose to stop at congratulating their children within the family, congratulating them on their good results in the exam.

A few years ago, during the ceremony to honor students in Ho Chi Minh City who achieved national excellent student status, a student who won second prize in this exam also asked permission to refuse to appear in the newspaper and to share his academic achievements.

She said her parents did not attend the ceremony to commend or share about her achievements like many other families. Only a few relatives knew about her achievement as a national excellent student, and it was not a big deal or a big deal.

For my parents, the responsibility of studying is mine, the results of studying are mine, parents are just happy to "share" it, no need to be too happy.

For my parents, the result simply stops at passing or failing an exam. Passing is not a cause for celebration and failing is not a cause for sadness, as long as I did my best at that time. So I entered every exam with a light heart, without any fear of “failing”.

My parents always told me that academic achievement is just a small part of life, don't let your joy and sadness sink in it. Your life is also about eating, resting, playing sports , doing housework, connecting with people and understanding yourself...

Not sharing your child’s academic results and achievements is not just about keeping your child a secret. For many parents, they also consider their child’s achievements as their own. And that is also a way for them to protect their children, not attaching their value to their scores and academic achievements.

Many children assume that they are only good, good, and valuable when they get high scores and good academic results.

So many children fall into the cycle of having to achieve higher, better results, otherwise they fear their parents will be disappointed, feel they are not valuable enough, not loved... There are children who regularly get 10s, even a 9 can make them depressed and scared.

In the topic "How to teach children to become normal people" held at a school in Ho Chi Minh City, Master Dinh Thanh Phuong mentioned the academic pressures that children are having to bear.

Many good students bear the pressure of academic expectations (Illustration: Hai Long).

Not only poor students, Master Dinh Thanh Phuong noted that parents need to pay attention to children who study well and achieve high results.

Perhaps the praises from parents and others make them not dare to stop, not dare to accept themselves, always have to push themselves to achieve better results or at least maintain the old achievements. They are very afraid of the sad eyes, the sighs from their parents when things do not meet their expectations.

This creates invisible stress on children's minds. Many young people have very good academic results, wealthy families, and seemingly bright futures... but have extremely heartbreaking endings due to excessive expectations and pressure.

Source: https://dantri.com.vn/giao-duc/con-la-thu-khoa-bo-me-xin-tu-choi-khen-ngoi-20250704085307916.htm