Broken marriage, child returns to father's arms

Marriage has never been easy for anyone. When two strangers fall in love and live together, they both want to build a home, have children, and live together for the rest of their lives. But between dreams and reality there is always a huge gap.

Living together with countless difficulties, differences in thinking, lifestyle, and disagreements in raising children, etc., make many couples "give up". That is when they can no longer accept each other, can no longer tolerate each other, and no longer want to try for each other.

For a long time, when talking about divorce, we always think that the children of a broken family are the ones who are most affected. In fact, there is another group that we have overlooked, which is the parents of both sides.

The broken happiness of children greatly affects the health and spirit of parents, because no matter how grown up, children are still the little children of their parents. Seeing their children unhappy, no parent can feel at ease.

Faced with the broken marriage of their children, each parent has a different way of facing and handling it. There are silent tears, there are lax words of reproach... But perhaps, after all, every parent sympathizes with their child's pain.

Among the works submitted to the second “Father and Daughter” writing contest organized by Vietnam Family Magazine, the work “Dad!” by author Nguyen Anh Nguyet ( Hai Phong ) depicts the image of a father witnessing his daughter “missing the boat” twice, making the organizers emotional.

Recalling her two past marriages, the author shared that she got married for the first time when she was in her final year of university – a marriage that people often called “a wedding due to pregnancy”. Knowing that she was pregnant, the girl in her 20s at that time was scared and panicked, not daring to tell anyone. However, her father found out and gently comforted and protected his daughter from her mother’s anger.

“I don’t know how my father knew, he gently called me into the room, encouraged me to share with him the things I was worried about… He listened quietly, occasionally stroking my hair, comforting me like a child. Then he chose his words to speak to my mother, patiently calming her terrible anger about the terrible sin I had committed. Relatives and neighbors praised me for being smart and beautiful. Now that halo has faded, the pride of my mother who was studying had to get married to avoid pregnancy, how humiliating”, the author wrote.

Perhaps getting married at such a young age made the couple not fully aware of their responsibilities as parents and husband and wife. The marriage broke down, and the author sent her child back to her parents' house. At that time, it was her father who single-handedly took care of and taught the child.

When her son went to college, the author decided to remarry, but fate was ironic. She divorced and returned to her parents despite all the gossip in society. At the age of 40, with past wounds, the author sometimes felt “afraid of men”, and decided to stay single until her son got married, helping her son take care of her grandchildren. However, her father objected.

“Who would have thought that my father would strongly oppose my idea of “staying single”. He told me not to be afraid of love, and that I should even fall in love if I met a man who made my heart flutter. Love makes people younger and more fulfilled. No matter how much my parents loved me, they could not give me the feeling of a happy couple. I was so surprised when my father said that,” author Nguyen Anh Nguyet confided.

So we can see, no matter how mature or foolish the children are, parents still want their children to have their own happiness. Just like the father in the work “Dad is the sunshine in my life” by author Ngoc Nu ( Ho Chi Minh City), he listened to the phone call from his daughter informing him of the broken engagement in a calm state of mind without blaming or complaining.

The author confided: “We have known each other for nearly four years, have taken photos and have set a wedding date for the end of the year. I was even pregnant beforehand. But… sometimes life will send you unexpected lessons.”

Regardless of the gossip of the world, the father was still willing to stand by his daughter. For him, it was okay for his 30-year-old daughter to not be married, the important thing was that she had to find someone who truly loved her, and not choose the wrong person in haste. However, as soon as he hung up the phone, the father could not hold back his tears. Tears of pity for the pain his daughter had to go through: “It was only much later that my sister told me that when talking to me on the phone, no matter how strong my father appeared, he hung up and sat down in misery. He covered his face and cried like a child. He cried because he felt so sorry for his daughter, cried because he always did good deeds to accumulate virtue for his daughter, but now I fell into this painful situation.”

Sharing the same story, the father in the work "Dad - My lifelong hero" by author Nguyen Thi Bich Nhan ( Phu Yen ) has a completely different way of facing it.

The author shared that during their time together, she suffered abuse from her "playboy" husband many times. Many times she took her child back to her parents' house, but her father, although he loved his child, never blindly defended her: "My father said, my daughter is married, it's not as simple as just taking her home alone if she wants. My mother defended me, saying: she was beaten by her husband. But my father was still determined to hear both sides and then told me to go home."

After five years of marriage, the couple decided to divorce. The author’s father, upon hearing the news, traveled hundreds of miles to find his son-in-law, hoping to save the marriage, but waited in vain. Although he did not want his daughter to divorce, when it was too late, the father still welcomed his daughter back with open arms.

“It’s too bad, he only asked his parents to tell him, not personally calling his father-in-law. I was so sad when I saw the “hero” of my life leave with his deep, sad eyes. After the divorce, my father said: Mom and I should stop lingering in a foreign land, make arrangements to come home, where Mom and Dad are together”, author Nguyen Thi Bich Nhan confided.

There was a time when people considered divorce a terrible thing, so even though it was painful, they still endured it with the reason that their children would have parents, that their parents could look up to their neighbors and relatives, and that they themselves would not have to bow their heads to the world.

Now, society is more open, freed from the shackles of old prejudices, people no longer grit their teeth and endure, put aside their egos to try to mend the cracks in their marriage. Like a broken phone, instead of taking it to be repaired, they buy a new one.

But each flower and each family has its own circumstances, no one can live another person's marriage to judge what they should do. Everyone has their own reasons, reasons that are legitimate to them.

The important thing is that after every broken marriage, children can still return to their family, to the arms of their parents, where they are sheltered and protected from the storms of life.

Rules of the 2nd writing contest on the topic "Father and Daughter" in 2024
Requirements for entries
– Entries must be articles that have not been published on any media, radio or social network and have not participated in other competitions. Write about real stories where the author is the character or witness, memories, confidences, and stories of fathers to their daughters and vice versa, expressed in the form of notes, reports, interviews, essays, diaries, etc. The Organizing Committee encourages authors to use real images of characters in their entries.
– The article must be written in Vietnamese, 1,000 – 1,500 words long, printed on paper or sent via email provided by the Organizing Committee.
– Each author can submit a maximum of three (03) entries and must be responsible for the authenticity and accuracy of the content. Copying or plagiarizing others in any form is prohibited.
– The selected entries published in the Vietnam Family Magazine will be paid royalties according to regulations and will be owned by the editorial board; the author has no right to claim copyright.
Contestants: All Vietnamese citizens at home and abroad except those who are staff of the Organizing Committee, Jury, sponsors and accompanying units of the contest.
Time and address for receiving entries
– Time for receiving entries: From March 27, 2024 to June 10, 2024 based on the postmark and mail receipt time. The Closing Ceremony and Award Gala will take place on Vietnamese Family Day, June 28, 2024.
– Handwritten or typed entries should be sent to the Vietnamese Family Editorial Office. Address: No. 2 Le Duc Tho Street, Cau Giay District, Hanoi.
On the envelope, clearly write: Contest entry “Father and daughter” with author information, address, phone number. The Organizing Committee is not responsible if the contest entry is lost or damaged due to postal errors.
– Online entries sent via email: [email protected]
Prize
The 2nd "Father and Daughter" Writing Contest in 2024 has the following award structure: 01 first prize, 02 second prizes, 03 third prizes, 05 consolation prizes and 05 secondary prizes.
In addition to the cash prize, the winning authors will also receive a certificate from the Organizing Committee, a book containing the entries and gifts (if any) from the sponsor.
Competition Jury
– Poet Hong Thanh Quang – Head of the jury
– Poet Tran Huu Viet – Head of the Department of Culture and Arts, Nhan Dan Newspaper
– Writer Nguyen Mot
– Writer, journalist Vo Hong Thu – Tien Phong Newspaper
For more information about the contest, please contact
– Editorial office of Vietnam Family Magazine: No. 2 Le Duc Tho Street, Cau Giay District, Hanoi City.
+ Journalist Phan Khanh An - Editor-in-Chief, Member of the Organizing Committee. Phone number: 0975.470.476
+ Ms. Bui Thi Hai En – Editorial staff. Phone number: 0973.957.126
– Email: [email protected].