Eating with the phone

Honestly, I don't like my phone very much. But recently I realized that, when I'm home alone at noon, I eat lunch with it.

Illustration: TA'S

When I was a student, I still ate alone. Now, my husband works until evening, so I have lunch alone. Unlike before, when I would sit and eat in silence or just finish it quickly, now I sit and look at my phone and prolong the meal with entertainment programs and my favorite movies. It turns out that I have been eating with my phone for a long time without even realizing it. In the past, eating alone was a kind of loneliness that is hard to describe. But now, eating with a phone does not make people feel less lonely.

I always like full and bustling meals. My mother always said that when my husband and I eat together, my parents eat more because of the atmosphere. Obviously, the more people in the house, the more they can eat, but sometimes, it is the "atmosphere" that creates a feeling of deliciousness because of the connection and joy. Try a meal when husband and wife are angry with each other, or parents and children are frowning, do you enjoy the meal?

The ancients had a saying that “lightning avoids meals”, implying that when eating, we should avoid scolding and blaming each other. Perhaps the deeper implication is that during meals, focusing on eating is the most important thing, leaving other things for later. That is, focusing on the taste of the food, focusing on chewing and enjoying it, focusing on the family gathering atmosphere. Moreover, we should pay attention to who is in the kitchen today, how hard that person has cooked, how grateful we should be… Now, the phone appears on the dining table, parents check their email to monitor work, children are absorbed in entertainment programs, no one knows how the meal ends.

You used to nag at your phone, saying that if it hadn't appeared during meals, you and your husband wouldn't have gotten divorced. At the end of the day, everyone hopes for a happy family meal. Husband and wife ask each other about their work day, tell each other about everything under the sun, compliment each other on how delicious this dish is, how much they miss that dish... But your husband, at mealtime, puts his phone on the table to watch some program. You ask, he says "uh huh" a few times and then stops. After eating, he continues to hug his phone into the bathroom, and when he goes to sleep, he still holds his phone until his eyes close. Many times, your husband falls asleep while the phone is still blaring from the programs he is watching.

Your family's story is still common in many families today. We blame the smartphone with all the entertainment applications that have attracted everyone's time and attention, leading to a lack of sharing and empathy. Everyone knows the harmful effects of using the phone during meals. From physical to mental health, it can be harmful but it is difficult to change. Sadly, not only adults, but also children today, mostly eat with their phones. Except for the patient mothers who raise their children scientifically , let their children sit at the table, guide and point out this food and that, many other parents often entice their children to eat with some technological device. Children chew and swallow unconsciously because their eyes are busy watching attractive entertainment programs or clips on iPads and phones. Watching those things is very addictive, even adults are addicted, let alone children. As a result, if a meal is without a phone, children will not eat.

Not only in family meals, but also in meals with friends, colleagues, and partners, the phone also occupies space and time. From taking photos to swiping, from scrolling through Facebook to scrolling through Tiktok, to Instagram, to Youtube, then following hot, sensational news... the stories on the phone are more interesting than the stories of the person opposite. I also see many people who are good at texting but lazy to start a conversation, diligently interacting with each other on social networks but shy away from communicating in real life. When meeting in person, they don't greet each other, but online, behind the phone, people are surprisingly friendly.

Imagine eating alone or with someone else with your phone, following the random stories on it, it feels so lonely and isolated. Sometimes I feel so angry with the phone, the thing that seems to connect people but sometimes makes them distant from each other. The phone appearing during a meal seems to make us forget the taste of the food, forget the voice and eyes of the person we love...

Miraculous Love

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